Selfishness (matsara or swartha) is an action in which one is concerned exclusively or overly with one’s profit, pleasure, or gain without regard for the welfare of others and often at the expense of others. Selflessness, on the other hand, is placing the welfare of others before one’s own. One cannot be completely selfless to the extent of neglecting one’s priorities or purpose in life. At the same time, one should not be completely selfish, so much so that one completely neglects the needs and wants of others in fulfilling one’s objectives. What is needed is a happy balance between selfishness and selflessness.

Fear (Bhaya) is an emotion that results from the belief that something or someone is hazardous and is likely to induce pain or discomfort. The operative word in this conceptualization is that it is a belief or a perception that may not be factual. It is a hindrance on the spiritual path as well as everyday life. For some of us, it has become a habit to over-assess the negative outcomes and thus we develop fears. Such a disposition is often associated with pessimism.

Aahana (name changed on request), 16 years old, is a high-school student in the Twin Cities (Minneapolis-Wisconsin) who came to the United States as a child. She has an older sibling who has been a straight A student and is now in medical school. However, Aahana has always struggled with her performance in school. She has been shamed by her family and Indian-origin peers who have excelled in school. Her poor performance was always attributed to her laziness and a lack of applying herself.

How do we go about surrendering our ego to achieve a greater purpose in life?

Jealousy (Irshya in Sanskrit) is an emotion that is also known as envy or covetousness which is common to almost all human beings. It’s often called as “the green-headed monster.” It is not a single emotion but consists of a complex of fear, anger, humiliation, feelings of loss of status, and nervousness.

We may never be able to “get over” the loss of a loved one but can learn to live again by keeping positive memories while forgetting the negative ones.

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